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Current Poll

Who is your Favourite Guest Rebel?

Avalon - (Project Avalon)
Avalon - (Project Avalon)
24% [31 Votes]

Selma - (Horizon)
Selma - (Horizon)
4% [5 Votes]

Tyce - (Bounty)
Tyce - (Bounty)
15% [19 Votes]

Norm One - (Redemption)
Norm One - (Redemption)
2% [2 Votes]

Bek - (Shadow)
Bek - (Shadow)
6% [8 Votes]

Kasabi - (Pressure Point)
Kasabi - (Pressure Point)
15% [20 Votes]

Hal Mellanby - (Aftermath)
Hal Mellanby - (Aftermath)
17% [22 Votes]

Hunda - (Traitor)
Hunda - (Traitor)
5% [7 Votes]

Deva - (Blake)
Deva - (Blake)
8% [10 Votes]

Other
Other
5% [7 Votes]

Votes: 131
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Started: 09 July 2016

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November 2018 Ficlet Challenge
purplecleric
In Greek mythology the legendary hunter Orion and the goddess Artemis held a competition to test their hunting prowess. Orion had boasted that he could single-handedly kill every animal on Earth. Artemis used her deadly Scorpion to prove him wrong. As thanks, Artemis turned the scorpion into a constellation.

The word prompt this month is … HUNT


Some familiar faces appeared as ‘pointless’ celebrities last month, including a pair of B7 actors. For the second challenge; what if the one or several B7 characters appeared on a game show?
 
JustBrad
And now it’s time to put a celebrity in our reasonably priced space chopper. May I introduce Doctor Plaxton of Federation Research and Development!

Applause

Doctor Plaxton, welcome. I understand you are quite the plasma head.

Thank you, Jeremy. Yes, I’ve always been a fan of space racing, but my main interest is in the vehicle, not the pilot.

Indeed, our tame racing driver, The Word, said that while you had only a lay person’s talent in the pilot’s seat, you were quite knowledgeable in the technical aspects of space race ship design. He said you were particularly interested in the power link couplings, and made a few minor alterations? We don’t usually allow that.

I’ve always been a bit of a tinkerer, Jeremy.

And quite a talented tinkerer according to Federation R and D, which I suppose explains all the strapping young lads in their black jumpers, green visors, and large guns.

Not to sound immodest, Jeremy, but I am rather important to the Federation’s plans for expansion.

Indeed, you are, Doctor Plaxton. I suppose that’s why Fed R&D insisted you be allowed to make any safety modifications you desire. They were safety modifications?

Jeremy, I can say without question the modifications I made will guarantee my safety.

All right, then, let’s get you into your reasonably priced space chopper and watch your lap. We’ll see that, right after the break.

*******************************


And she’s off. Not much of a start. All right, she’s coming up on Mars. Not the best line through the asteroid belt. Now on to Jupiter. Picking up a bit of speed. Now for the hammerhead turn between Io and Titan. Oh, a bit loose there. Now into the long straight towards Pluto. I say, look at her go. My, she’s really picking up speed. Careful, she’ll never make the turn.

Oooh, yes, she’s off the course and disqualified… but… still picking up speed. She’s… how fast? Standard by Twelve you say? In real time? Is she slowing down to make the turn? She isn’t? What? Oh. We’ll be right back after this unscheduled break.

*******************************

Ladies and gentlemen, this is Federation Central Security. We regret to inform you that due to technical difficulties, the entire cast of Space Top Gear have been killed in a transporter accident, and the show has been canceled.


.
 
Hugbot
Thanks for the good laugh, Brad! That was brilliant!
 
BradPaula
Laughing out loud, dear husband! Brilliant.
Zil: Oneness must resist the Host.
 
mrsbookmark
That was hilarious!Smile
 
Anniew
Hunted

Given the height of her heels, the slim figure raced with a surprising turn of speed across the ground, flashes of sunlight reflecting off the crystals encrusting her white gown. The foremost of her pursuers gave a shout and pointed towards the winking beams. Immediately the men gave chase. The music accompanying her flight swelled, its tempo quickening. For several minutes it looked as if she’d be caught but she reached the ruins and disappeared inside. By the time they got there, she had disappeared.

The smaller of the two men watching these events gave a cheer and even his older companion, a man who didn’t look much inclined to laughter, managed a self-satisfied grin as he switched off the screen.

“Day ten, Avon...she’s going to make it,” the smaller man crowed. “We’ll be rich!”

“Did you doubt it?” His companion turned pointedly towards him but before he could say anything further, the door behind him crashed open. A burly, imposing figure stood framed in the aperture, arms akimbo.

“What were you thinking, Avon? What the hell were you thinking?” it demanded, dangerously, but although the smaller man instantly tried to look inconspicuous, the object of this fury stood his ground with imperturbable calm.

“I gather your squeamish conscience doesn’t like my solution?” Avon drawled.

“Solution? How in hell is this a solution? It’s horrific.. barbaric...it’s...”

“Effective?” the small man supplied ingratiatingly . “Since it started, your popularity index has risen 10 points... Two birds with one stone you might say.”

“Shut up Vila. That’s hardly the point...I accepted the Presidency on the promise of bringing enlightened government to the Federation....instead we have...this...this.... abomination...”

“Correct me if I misremember, but I seem to recall you forbidding, “ absolutely” that we publicly execute her,” Avon remarked with glacial formality.

“I did...I thought...”

“And,” Avon continued ruthlessly, “ Dayna’s suggestion that she challenge her to a fight to the death.”

“I can’t endorse private vendettas Avon. Surely even you can see...”

“Further, you refused to heed Orac’s prediction that if you simply incarcerated her she would prove a magnet for every nut job objecting to your policy of educating deltas and granting any remaining Aurorna full Earth citizenship...”

“Yes well it.....”

“So, as your Chief Security Advisor, I took matters into my own hands. Bread and Circuses, Blake.”

“It’s day ten, Avon...she’s still at large. The population has taken to her... they’re helping her evade the trackers.. there’s every chance she’ll make it to the end and be in a position to claim the prize... What do I do then, hmmmm?

“Do you think me a fool? She survives only because I planned it so. Those “helpful” citizens were selected by Vila here and given the resources to ensure she evades capture. She was infected with a slow acting virus before the start of the hunt...It should start kicking in in earnest just after she wins and, despite the best efforts of your medics, she will, unfortunately fail to recover from it... You will arrange a state funeral for her and magnanimously announce that the prize money will be given to her next of kin, as a mark of respect. Popularity thus ensured, you will, virtually unanimously, be voted in for a second term...”

“Ohhh...well...I suppose in that case.... Who is her next of kin by the way?”

A slight pause ensued and then Vila supplied, “Some nonentity. She married him, oh about...umm... ”

“About two years ago, “ Avon continued. “About the time she returned to Earth. New identity. We were monitoring Sleer and Servalan and she slipped under Orac’s surveillance beam for a while..”

+A very short while,+ The Perspex box in front of the vid screen spoke abruptly, the rhythm of its flashing lights conveying its annoyance.

“ Oh yes, Orac. She didn’t fool you for long. You soon found her out.”

+ It became obvious when I discovered that you two had...+ Orac subsided abruptly with a frustrated whine.

“ We were happy to help, weren’t we Avon?” Vila offered, deftly juggling Orac’s key.

“What? Oh yes...”

“Team work you see, Blake. That’s what you’ve got in us. A successful team. My contacts, Orac’s intelligence and Avon’s....Avon’s...”

“Killer instinct? “ Avon interjected.

“ I was going to say homicidal paranoia...but I suppose killer instinct covers it..”

“When you’ve quite finished with the mutual admiration, I’d be grateful if you’d tell me the name of this nonentity that I’m about to make one of the richest Citizens of New Earth?” Blake enquired impatiently. “I’ve an Empire to run.”

Avon and Vila assumed identically innocent expressions.

“Nova Latser...” they chorused.
Just because I can't sing doesn't mean I won't.
 
Mrs_Underhill
JustBrad, that was hilarious! Pity that Dr.Plaxton wasn't as good in running to as she was in running from.

Anniew,
Anniew wrote:
“Nova Latser...” they chorused.

Ahaha! Smile What a delightful and yet chilling idea on how to end Servalan. Very Avon and Vila.
 
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